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Top 25 Best Horror Books

Tired of reading crappy horror novels? Looking for horror books that don't suck? Then check out this list of the top 25 scariest books in the genre!

There are a lot of wannabe writers in the world cranking out books with the scare factor and entertainment of the Paranormal Activity franchise. Ick! I've sorted through all the drivel to bring you some of the best and scariest horror books I've ever read, reaching across a number of subgenres such as paranormal horror, southern gothic, Bizarro, thriller horror, and all the others. There are so many more books I would have loved to include but alas this is a short list and picking the best books are like picking your favorite child (or favorite Beatles song if you don't have kids, and if you don't like the Beatles, you're crazy). For each entry, I've provided my opinions of the book extending beyond "yeah this book is good and you should read it." The list is ordered by a ranking system I've made up ranging from "Holy Shit!" to "Not bad, not bad at all." This list will not appease everyone and there are so many awesome horror books out there, so I apologize if you don't see a book or author that you worship on this list, I just simply can't include all of them. This list is meant to highlight some of the best modern horror books but to also pay tribute to the classics that continue to scare us. Another goal of this list is to provide you, the avid reader and horror fan with a broad selection of books to choose from that I feel you will enjoy as much as I did so you can have a head start on keeping ahead of the countless amount of crap that imitates and tries to pass its self off as horror and literature.



 

Told through the perspectives of a few characters toting diaries to tell their story, this tale also serves as a mystery novel. Dracula, sitting alone in his Gothic castle in Transylvania, decides to move to England to fuck shit up.

Of course Dracula is number one on this list. Vampires are still a large staple in literature and are still trending. However, none of the sparkly pedo vampires that pre-teen girls drool over can hold a candle to the original. The track record of this novel speaks for itself. The book needs no Bram Stoker award since the guy wrote the damn thing. Dracula has been adapted to countless movies and plays and is still regarded as the best vampire story ever written, making it deserving of the number one spot. The writing is superb and written with enthusiasm. Stoker did his research on Victorian folklore, making the book that more dynamic. The narrative structure was one of my favorite things about the book. Few books can pull off 1st person narrations with multiple characters but Dracula does it flawlessly. Dracula didn't meet my expectations, it blew them out of the water.

 

 

 

House of Leaves is a story about a house that is bigger on the inside than it is on the outside. The house is a labyrinth. The book itself: also a labyrinth. The book could be called post-post-modern. The experimental style was enough to hook me. It is so experimental that is gets to the point of being downright ridiculous but all the while manages to stay tasteful. This is one of my favorite books EVER. Never has a novel made me feel claustrophobic and agoraphobic at the same time. Nor have I ever found myself turning a book sideways, upside down and holding it in front of the mirror to try to decipher hidden codes before.

There is a lot to appreciate about House of Leaves, one thing being how multi-layered the book is. A group of editors present us with a jumble of manuscripts written by a narrator named Johnny Truant. Johnny tells the story of his discovery of another manuscript he found from a peculiar blind man named Zampanò. These manuscripts talk of a film called The Navidson Effect (a documentary about the house). It is unclear if the Navidson Effect is just a figment of Zampanò's imagination or if Zampanò is just a figment of Johnny's imagination or if Johnny is even real, which has you questioning whether or not the damn book you're holding is even real. So why is this book so scary and amazing at the same time besides the style? Short answer: Danielewski plays on the age old fear of the unknown, and making the villain a HOUSE!

 

American Psycho is the first person account of the dapper Patrick Bateman. Bateman is a yuppie stockbroker by day and vicious serial killer, rapist, and overall asshole by night.

Say what you will about the author's ambiguous sexuality, misogynistic Tweets, and ironic lack of fashion sense, but the man can write. American Psycho is the most controversial of his works (it is banned in many countries) and arguably his magnum opus. The book was adapted into a Christian Bale movie but the film doesn't begin to scratch the surface of the novel. Patrick Bateman is an infectious character that stalks you even after you put the book down. I still find myself quoting him, mumbling about returning videotapes and lecturing about the best kind of moisturizer to use to slack jawed listeners. Few books have ever made me squirm, gag, and seethe in jealousy at the words. American Psycho will shake your reality when you realize the book redefines the horror genre. This isn't your traditional horror novel nor is it for your grandma that has heart problems. The novel is scary because it holds a mirror to our a culture, a culture that breeds monsters like Patrick Bateman. The novel shows us that the boogie man is real and he comes in all shapes and sizes. It is so much more than what Marquis de Sade would have wrote on acid.

 

If you snorted a fat rail of blow and screwed your best friend’s hot mom at a Rammstein concert, you still wouldn’t be close to the adrenaline rush of this piece of work. Oskar, the protagonist, is a chubby 12 year old that is the constant target of bullying. His path crosses with Eli, a centuries old vampire who is strange even to a socially backwards kid like Oskar who becomes obsessed with the murders happening in the area and fantasizes about murdering his bullies.

This book is scary. Great thesis statement right? No, this book is “fucking scary.” The reason this novel scares me, besides the gruesome descriptions (there is a scene of a man in a powdered wig drinking a bowl of blood with a floating penis in it) is because of its raw and brutal honesty. Society is the most dangerous vampire in Lindqvist’s world. Bullies, alcoholics, drug dealers, murderers, and pedophiles; these types recur to move the plot forward. This Lindqvist novel has been adapted into film twice. The Swedish version is worth taking a look at but is only the tip of the iceberg to this disturbing tale. If you want a real vampire novel, learn how to pronounce John Ajvide Lindqvist and pick this one up. In short, this book should be praised alongside Dracula and Salem’s Lot. Just make sure you wear a Styrofoam “piss ball” like Oskar when you read this novel.

 

When Jack Torrance isn’t craving a stiff drink, lying to his wife, beating his psychic son Danny, and writing his play; he is the caretaker of a snowed-in, expensive-ass haunted hotel. It is on record that Jack Torrance is the most autobiographical of all King’s characters. Shame on you Stephen. Shame on you for contributing to the fiction writer stereotype.

This particular Stephen King tale scared me because as I progressed through the story, I quickly started to feel like Danny Torrance up in that drafty hotel. Or more accurately started feeling like one of John Wayne Gacy’s houseguests. The novel channeled in me a fear that I haven’t felt since childhood. It is the kind of fear that struck me when I first discovered the Tim Curry portrayal of Pennywise by myself. The lost child kind of fear.

 

This is an awesomely disturbing novel about one man's decent into madness. This novel is Part supernatural horror, part psychological horror and all horror. There is a reason this book tops most of the "best horror" critic lists that frequent the web.

 

The Shining was adapted into a Stanley Kubrick film starring Jack Nicholson which forever embedded the quote “HERES JOHNNY!!!” into the brains of the viewers.

 

A sequel to The Shining is now available and is titled Dr. Sleep. Dr. Sleep follows Danny as a middle-aged man, not having a mid-life crisis or following in his father’s footsteps but saving a young girl from a pack of blood-thirsty paranormals.

 

 

 

 

David, the narrator, recalls his childhood. A childhood that would make every Iphone toting, snot-nose, pre-teen brat hang their head in shame. Ruth, the antagonist, ropes her three sons and a few neighborhood kids into her own sick game: torturing her nieces whom she adopted after their parents died.

Remember your childhood games? Tag, red rover, and erm...playing doctor. Ruth never grew out of those more secret games and instead of joining a book club like a regular middle-aged woman, she invents her own sadistic hobby. The fear this book struck in me didn’t come from vampires or zombies but from a much scarier villain: neighbors. The boogie man is real and he lives on your street. Just don’t trick-or-treat there. One of the things that scared me the most is that this story is loosely based on a true story: the murder of Sylvia Likens. What I found amazing about the book is how the use of violence is executed (no pun intended.) Sometimes it is what we don’t see that scares us the most. Ketchum doesn’t shy away from grit and gore, which I love to see in a horror book. The author shines a light on the fact that there is a dormant monster in all of us just waiting to be brought out by an authority figure that says “yes…it’s okay.” The movie adaptation is worth checking out too (the one with the psycho neighbor, not the b-list movie of the same name with the porn star neighbor.)

 

Dorian Gray, an aristocrat, is more vain than Kim Kardashian and more narcissistic than Justin Bieber. After seeing a portrait of himself, he wishes that his beauty and youth would last forever. He gets his wish.

This novel explores and satirizes the darker side of vanity. It is a shame that Oscar Wilde couldn't have lived in our generation when vanity is running wild (pun intended) and the laws regarding homosexuality are a bit more lenient. This novel will stand the test of time because of its message and relevance, not only to Wilde's generation, but for the future generations. Every man and woman should read this book, especially the ones that wax, shave, and pluck their body hair, specifically the intimate parts. Not only is this book scary, it has an important allegory that everyone could take a page from. Wilde's narration is masterful, Lord Henry's passages alone left me slack-jawed. The prose had me feeling jealous of the author, this book is proof that Wilde is a literary heavyweight, on par with writers such as Edgar Allen Poe. The Picture Of Dorian Gray provoked many emotions in me, emotions such as paranoia and desire. The Picture Of Dorian Gray has been adapted to film twice. Oscar Wilde blends horror, fantasy, and gothic themes all into one addictive cocktail.

 

 

 

 

The Road follows a father and son through a post-apocalyptic landscape after an unknown disaster has wiped out nearly the entire world.

This novel in my opinion is the most sentimental of McCarthy's books which is to say, far from a bad thing. McCarthy is unmatched when it comes to writing unforgiving landscapes. What I love about this book is that no word is wasted (except for maybe the conjunction: "and"). Seriously, count how many times he writes "and" in his books, I dare you. McCarthy shows us the horrors of mankind, especially in the face of a life or death situation in the same tone that he would describe his grocery list. The tone mixed with the content is unsettling to say the least. The author respects the post-apocalyptic genre and makes it his own. The message I picked up from this book is that if we aren't careful, we could find ourselves in the gray universe of The Road, a universe that is the home to many desperate predators, some of which are cannibals. Even cannibalism is handled well by the author which is hard to come by in this zombie obsessed craze publishers are still peddling. The Road was made in to a movie.

 

 

 

 

 

Okay so I'm using another Stephen King book, sue me. There is a reason he is the master of horror. Misery is the story of a deranged fan named Annie that rescues her favorite author from a car wreck and holds him hostage, forcing him to write additions of his romance series for her. This book scared the shit out of me because the novel is grounded in reality and well ya know, it could actually happen in real life. Annie's speeches were enough to send a chill down my spine. I found the book relatable since let's face it, deep down we have all experienced that obsessive admiration for celebrity. I'd kidnap Stephen King and make him write more on the Dark Tower Series just for the irony.

In Misery it is almost like we get to watch King write this story. He doesn't just set us up for a crazy tale and observe us discover things about the characters, it feels as if he actually takes the ride with us and faces the discoveries at the same time as the reader. That people, is what makes for a hell of a good story.

 

Jack Ketchum is talented and awesome enough to have two books on this list. The story follows a group of New Yorkers who travel to Maine for a vacation and run into a clan of inbred cannibals living in a cave near them.

 

The novel was dropped by its first publisher due to the controversy surrounding the book after its release because of its extreme violence. It was later picked up in '99 by another publisher with all the extra goriness added in that the first publisher forced the author to leave out. The inbred savages in the movie Deliverance (and the ones that live in my state) scared me enough, but make those savages cannibals and you have a creepy fucking horror story. Ketchum makes the book even creepier by the use of the settings. A cabin in the woods at night. A dark, wet cave where cannibals have set up shop for a make-shift butcher shop. No one is safe in the world of Off Season, so when the group of friends are attacked, they fight back with equally violent brute force, dropping down to the cannibals' level. The novel was adapted to film.

 

 

 

 

An unnamed narrator returns to his childhood home to attend a funeral. Dark and terrifying memories from his childhood flood his brain when he sees a pond that a girl, Lettie Hempstock claimed was an ocean behind an old farmhouse.

Neil Gaiman's imagination is a magical place. Most people would have to pay for mind-altering substances to have the imagination of Neil. This is a book of childhood and it is magical and scary all at the same time. Gaiman uses his own childhood as a reference point for the writing because hey, he only had one childhood. This novel blends fantasy and the mythological with horror. This is his first adult book since Anansi Boys. Don't be fooled though, by adult, I don't mean stockbroker characters snorting Bolivian Marching Powder out of strippers' fun spots, but rather the tone of the book is aimed at adults. Young adults will still love The Ocean at the End of the Lane though. This has been my favorite Gaiman book since his short story collection Smoke and Mirrors. This is a big statement considering picking a favorite Neil Gaiman book is like a parent picking a favorite child.

 

 

Finally a zombie story that isn’t shit! WWZ is a document of the first person accounts by survivors of the zombie apocalypse. Zombies take a backseat in this story and Brooks instead focuses on characterization and political satire.

Brooks didn’t skip on his homework. He researched technology, politics, economics, culture, and military tactics which is more than Congress can say. I fucking loved this book if you haven’t noticed yet. The author has almost redefined what a zombie book is. The format is unconventional, it is character as opposed to plot driven, and has the drama of a Matthew Weiner script. The book has recently been adapted into a blockbuster hit (or Redbox for that matter…ha!) Okay I digress. What the movie doesn’t have is the political satire. What the book doesn’t have is Brad Pitt. Both mediums have their advantages and stand on their own feet but what is remarkable about the book is the fact that you easily forget you are reading a FICTION book. The first person narratives of the well rounded characters are that badass. Hands down, the best zombie book on the market at the moment.

 

Mary, Percy her husband, Lord Byron, and John Polidori had a competition to write the scariest story. The rest was history. Mary Shelley or rather Dr. Frankenstein created a monster scarier than Joan Rivers, though it hasn't been proven which atrocity came first.

There are a lot of great things to be said about this book that pretty much speak for themselves. It is considered one of the first science-fiction books, has been adapted into plays and movies and is a staple in many cultures. What I love about the book is the Gothic themes Shelley employs and how she sneakily makes the reader sympathize with the monster. I had to respect her statement that she was making with the book: there are many flaws with the idea of the industrial movement and man shouldn't play God. You hear that Morgan Freeman?

 

 

 

 

 

Richard Bachman died from cancer of the pseudonym. It was Stephen King’s pseudonym that died, and that pseudonym was Richard Bachman. King deserves three books on this list without justification. The Long Walk is King’s first written novel (not first published) and my favorite of his works. The skinny: 100 boys meet once a year for a competition, the winner gets one wish met, anything he wants (I’d wish for a night with Audrey Hepburn) and the loser gets a bullet to the face; they have to walk without slowing or stopping until they reach the finish line.

No one can develop a character like Stephen King and never has it been more evident than in this novel. I first read this novel in middle school, the words have stuck with me more permanently than an STD. Although it did molest my psyche more than just a little bit. The concept is amazing and it isn’t without its twists and turns. Since its a Bachman book, it is darker and angrier than his "regular" Stephen King books. I can say without flinching that this is among his best works. Make it the next King novel you read if you haven’t read it.

 

 

 

 

 

We Live Inside You, not a novel but a short story collection that is worthy of making the list."Holy shit," were the only words I could use to describe how I felt after each story I read in this book. What makes these stories even more twisted are the Bizarro elements stitched in.

Alex Pardee did the cover artwork for this collection which is in itself is disturbing and eye catching. This short story collection has garnered the attention of house hold names like Chuck Palahniuk and Jack Ketchum who gave blurbs to the book. Needless to say, I'm jealous of Johnson's writing chops and emotional depth he conveys in these stories. Each individual story sucker punched me in the brain, leaving me near crippled but begging for more. The author is the pied piper of words, playing with language and the readers' minds. The stories contained in this book would make even David Lynch's, David Cronenberg's, and William Burroughs' post-orgy crack baby jealous. These stories are everything horror should be: uncomfortable, gritty, and violent. Each story is unpredictable and haunting. I'm almost convinced that Jeremy Robert Johnson wrote these stories in the fit of a long PCP bender, only stopping to drink the blood of sacrificed virgins.

 

A girl gets her soul jacked by a demon named Pazuzu. Throw in an exorcist, a detective, and a priest and you have a diabolical tale of dread.

The most impressive aspect of the book for me was the dense and beautiful prose. The sentencing is slick and stylish. The Exorcist played on my senses. Blatty drives the point home of how foul the demon is by the smell every time the demon possessed girl excretes her bile. A scary element that the film adaptation didn't show was the satanic worship and the ugliness of the practices the worshipers employ. This novel is without a doubt a true classic. Nowhere in the novel did it drag or get boring. The inner turmoil of the characters is what keeps the fear alive in these pages and what makes new generations of readers pick up this book, making it without a doubt a true classic. The thing that makes the book better than in its film counterpart is the fact that the book allowed me as a reader to conjure up my own images of the story, what the people looked like, how bad the stench was, etc.

 

 

 

 

After Carl Streator reads what he thought was a beautiful lullaby to his wife and only child, they both dropped dead. Turns out it was the culling song which is an African chant from a story book called Poems and Rhymes from Around the World that is a song that kills anyone it is read to.

Palahniuk didn't stop at a killer song to scare me, he added witchcraft, necrophilia, and dead babies as a cherry on top. The characters are interesting and well developed. Lullaby has its Palahniuk-ish moments that his fans will easily recognize (one of the characters makes his money by placing fake class action lawsuit ads in newspapers, forcing the companies he attacks to pay him off). Lullaby is funny in a demented and depraved way while staying scary. Comedy and horror are the two hardest genres to write since they are so subjective, every reader has a different opinion of what is funny and scary. As a whole, I think the author blended comedy and horror into a perfectly balanced mixture. It didn't take much convincing to make me relate to the book. Who wouldn't want to be able to snuff people that piss you off with a simple song like Carl does?

 

A killer dubbed Buffalo Bill is out skinning girls. An FBI trainee must work with the notorious figure Hannibal Lecter (who is in an asylum) to track down Buffalo Bill.

The second book in the Hannibal series but it is great as an individual. Hannibal Lecter is one of the most horrifying, hypnotic, and strangely likable villains I've read in literature. Reading this made me feel like I was sitting in a bath of unease and tension. Chances are, you have heard a quote from the book since there are so many great lines. There are twists and turns, and I found myself actually caring about the characters. The Silence of the Lambs is forever embedded in our culture so you might as well jump on the bandwagon and see what the fuss is about. It is evident in the novel that Harris did his research on criminal investigation extensively. It is sometime hit or miss when a male author writes a female protagonist but I had no complaints of how Harris wrote Clarice Starling. Starling is aware of her beauty, she is intelligent, and is willful despite facing challenges of working in a misogynic department. Don't skip the book for the film, the book is more in your face (unless you just really want to see the scene of Ted Levine tucking his junk back to Goodbye Horses ya weirdo).

 

May Lynn dreamed of leaving the backwoods and becoming a Hollywood star but instead she became a murdered, waterlogged corpse. Sue Ellen (the narrator) and her friends Terry, Jinx, and Sue Ellen's alchie mother set out to dig up and burn May Lynn's body to ashes to spread them in Hollywood. Uncle Gene, Constable Sy, and Skunk, a legendary murderer set out to hunt them down after Sue and her friends steal Gene and Sy's money to fund the trip.

Racism, child molestation, women abuse, lies, conspiracies, and legends. This is the novel that Mark Twain would have wrote if he had a meth lab and moonshine still in his backyard (he probably had the still). A horror and thriller novel, another genre this could fall in to is the irreverent Southern Gothic Hillbilly Noir genre, a term coined by awesome fucking writer Donald Ray Pollock. When I started reading this book, I was hooked and didn't put it down until I was finished. The stripped down minimalist style of the writing made the grittiness of the novel hit that much harder. Lansdale knows how to write suspense and he knows how to flesh out well developed characters. This book has multiple layers of scariness, one of them being the realization that people like the characters in this book exist even today, especially in the rural areas.

 

 

 

 

The story follows protagonist Miriam Black: a badass, psychic Femme fatale.

The writing is fast-paced, interesting, and full of dark humor. Blackbirds could be described as a supernatural crime novel or paranormal thriller or urban fantasy with horror attached to the end of those but the author himself calls his canon "new pulp" which I can agree with. The novel is original but with familiar concepts which is a huge plus. The swearing and sex that was contained in the pages was an added bonus. The cover art is aesthetically pleasing which is more than I can say about my ex-girlfriend. There were lines in the book that had me laughing out loud. Another thing that I like about the book is that is the first of a series but the story is full and complete and we get to see more of Miriam Black. There is no short supply of violence in Blackbirds which makes it all the more dark and gritty. Blackbirds reminded me of a Palahniuk book but that only adds to the awesomeness. Wendig's voice is sharp enough to cut a diamond. There were parts that had me literally holding my breath, so a word of advice: wear an oxygen mask when you read this one.

 

 

Joe Hill knows economy of words, every sentence packs a sucker punch to the groin, erm...I mean brain. This novel tells the story of child diddler slash murderer Charlie Manx who takes kids for rides in his Rolls-Royce to a place called Christmasland, a place which exists in his liver spotted head. Vic McQueen has a special, supernatural talent as well. Vic, being the only survivor of Manx's hobby, Manx seeks revenge by snatching Vic's own son years later.

Joe Hill is Stephen King's spawn, so my expectations were met unsurprisingly. However Hill doesn't need name recognition because his voice is his own and his talent speaks for itself. NOS4A2 blends fantasy and horror into a cocktail strong enough to impress Don Draper. This book lands the number ten spot on the list because it is an enjoyable read but as Joe Hill is still growing as a writer, I'm curious to see if his next book will blow this one out of the water and make his way up the ladder. Despite being named NOS4A2, after Nosferatu, the vampire movie, this isn't really a vampire novel. I would call it a "Christmas horror novel."

 

Zombie is the first Joyce Carol Oates book I’ve read. Don’t worry, this isn’t of the Cranberries or Romero flavor. Zombie is based on the life of Jeffrey Dahmer. Dahmer was a notorious cannibal, serial killer, and fan boy of necrophilia before being baptized then beaten to death in prison.

The novel kept my attention throughout and never had a dull moment. The novel read like a real diary of a famous sick bastard. I squirmed a lot reading the words on the page, thinking the entire time “this shit actually happened.” After reading Zombie, I was a bit suspicious. The narrative is too real, too honest I thought. There could only be one explanation: Joyce Carol Oates was Dahmer’s ex drinking buddy. Or perhaps her alter-ego, a pale-skinned costume she wore while collecting male genitals in jars and attempting to make zombie sex slaves. I can’t blame Miss Oates though, whatever her alleged connection to Dahmer must have been, it was all in the name of research for her novel. This book is filled with colorful descriptions (scooping brains into a dust pan) delivered in the deadpan tone of a serial killer that only Joyce Carol Oates could create. This novel has forever made me a fan of her work. It is scary that Jeffrey Dahmer roamed the streets before. It is scary that people like Dahmer exist. And it is scary how deep into a killer’s mind a writer was able to delve. Zombie also won the Bram Stoker Award, an achievement which speaks for itself.

 

 

Red Moon is a story about a universe where humans and werewolves live amongst each other. 5% of the population is infected with the werewolf virus called lobos and it can't be cured with a comb and special shampoo, the infected citizens have to medicate themselves with Lupex.

One thing that I loved about this horror/thriller novel is the author's authority in his words. The transformations of Percy’s werewolves are unsettling and violent. Their behavior is disturbing and convincing. His research worked well in bringing this alternate universe to life and making the werewolves existence even more believable. I was aware not to let the allegory of what I assumed to be whites in America fearing change get in the way of how awesome the story line was. The suspense had me losing nights of sleep and scanning the woods near my house. The prose is phenomenal and the descriptions are lucid. The action scenes were notable as well, the werewolves in this book are a far stretch from Stephanie Myers' beasts. Percy provided a generous amount of gore in the book which definitely earned points with me. I think fans of the paranormal will enjoy this novel, I sure as hell did.

 

Lunar Park in short, is a mock memoir with a haunted McMansion as the setting.

This piece of work is so much different from the rest of Ellis' books which makes it that much more interesting. Of all of his books, Lunar Park has the most emotional depth. The main character Bret Ellis (the author wrote himself as the main character) is apathetic like most of the author's protagonists but this one has a different progression. Bret Ellis deals with his inner turmoil, his family life that is unraveling at the seams, and his haunted house all at the same time which kept my interest and kept the pages turning. There are still some recognizable Ellis-ish signature themes in the novel however, everyone in the family is medicated...even the dog. Lunar Park also satirizes the suburban life or the Starbucks culture as I like to call it. The novel has a strong start and an even stronger finish. I think the author did a great job of writing a story following the traditional story arc and the first person narration is so believable it is intoxicating. This work is proof that Ellis can write a story without blowjobs, copious amounts of cocaine, and fast cars. Okay well it touches on those things a little bit but they aren't the main driving force of the story.



 

The book is essentially about a drug called Soy Sauce and it gives users a window into another dimension.

First thing is first, this is an awesome title for a book. Wong knows how to draw readers in and keep them. The sequel to John Dies at the End is titled This Book is Full of Spiders: seriously, dude, don't touch it!. Well played sir. David Wong (a pen name) is the Editor In Chief of Cracked.com, which it doesn't take a rocket surgeon to figure out why he holds that position. The answer is that he is a kickass writer. The novel contains a good helping of Bizarro which always gets me happy in the pants, I mean the frontal lobe of my brain. I loved the book, and Wil Wheaton didn't think it sucked either. The novel is more than just fart and penis jokes by the way. Another thing I appreciated about the book was that the mistakes in the book (typos and such) weren't corrected but glorified by the writer, a bold and calculated move. The book is hilarious which is an interesting spin on the horror genre which can sometimes take itself too serious which is why I chose this one as the last entry. Despite the slightly spoiler-ish title, this story is full of twists, especially a super cool one at the end. The movie adaptation is pretty cool, but the book is better.

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